If you are a friend of someone who is in an abusive relationship and you want to help them get out of the abusive situation, here are some steps you can take:

Before your friend leaves:
  • Help them with a plan.
  • Create a code word.  This is used to let you know they want to leave without the abuser knowing.
  • Document abuse.  If you know when attacks happen, document it.  This could be helpful in court to prove the abuse did happen.
  • Help to pack an emergency bag.
Emergency bag contents:
  • Keys.
  • Duplicate ID's for person abused as well as children's identification if needed.
  • Cash.
  • Checkbook and bank information.
  • Court papers.
  • Medication.
After the abused leaves:
  • Let friends and family know.
  • Abused individual will need to get a protection order against abuser.
  • The abused's phone should have 911 programmed in.
  • A new cell phone number should be obtained.
  • Have abused's daily routine changed as well as avoid being alone.
  • Finally, help the abused find a safe place to stay.
Types of documentation of abuse:
  • Journaling.
  • Abused can see a doctor or file a police report.
  • Take photos.
As a friend of an abused person, any documentation and emergency bag should be kept in a safe place away from the abuser, and the abuser should not find out the location or even become aware of such a bag.

To find out more about creating a safety plan, visit The National Domestic Violence Hotline's website or call 800-799-SAFE.

Getting Help:
If you are concerned about yourself or someone that is presenting these symptoms or behaviors, one should be aware that there are many facilities and a variety of counselors to help individuals deal with relationship issues.  If you are a University of Louisiana at Lafayette student, and are concerned and would like to speak to a counselor, please contact the Counseling and Testing Center at 482-6480 for more information.  The center offers unlimited confidential sessions, free of charge to all students and university faculty/staff members.

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Counseling & Testing Center
P.O. Box 44010
Lafayette, LA  70504
Olivier Hall, Room 212
Phone:  337/482-6480
Fax:      337/482-1267
E-mail:   counseling@louisiana.edu